1. You've had a rubbish night's sleep
2. In your sleep dazed stupor (see #1) you zip tie your headlamp onto your helmet upside down and send up a bat signal instead of lighting your path
3. Great swarms of mosquitoes along the reserve will mistake your headlamp for the moon, and in some fanatical religious fervour, commit kamikaze death in your mouth, nostrils and eyes
4. Dozy pukekos on a similar suicide mission cross your path back to the relative safety of the pond, importing you into some life size mutant angry birds video game
5. You forget to pack either a pump or a spare tube and spend the whole time dreading a flat tyre
6. Your DVT leg will swell up and be both devoid of any strength, and significantly painful
7. Some ##%@@ will cook bacon and eggs with the windows open when you haven't eaten in over 10 hours. And then you'll remember you got up in the middle of the night for milk and biscuits and actually it's only 5 hours since you last ate, because, remember, you're a glutton
8. You're sure the bogey man lives in those trees by Domain Rd
9. While trying to focus on the positive that at least you have the reserve walkway to yourself, you round a blind corner and have to take evasive action to not leave treadmarks over someone on the path. This involves long wet grass and an inelegant ditch crossing
10. It's your day off work, but instead you're going to work, to teach five year olds, and should probably be conserving your energy
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